Saturday, December 17, 2011

Friday, December 16, 2011

not yet ...

well I haven't come out to family or anything, but I live in a world of thinking come on, could they really be surprised, what with me decorating the tables the last couple of Christmases... I don't know if anyone else has a dad like this, but mine, he only speaks personally to my mom, that's it. heart to heart communication is for mom only. he very rarely says anything personal to any of us in the family, indeed mom says he gets jealous if she spends too much time with one of her kids and not back at home with dad. ha he's not overbearing or controlling or anything like that, it's just how he feels. they are very much in love even now in retirement. well anyway, I've found the best thing is to write my dad things. never communicated better than emailing back and forth when I lived teaching in Central AMerica or a couple years ago while in kabbull. Somewhere I learned to recognize dad's love through his actions and not words. for example always fixing our cars, asking if we needed money for this or that, caring for us in all sorts of ways what with 5 kids... me I'm a talker and toucher, not my dad. We do pretty well together though what for an engineer type and a teach type. anyway, tonight I went to my folks' place for dinner with my sisses and their spouses. ( the dinner downtown with my friend from Dallas didn't work out) We had a great time catching up and my parents wanted to hear all about the trip etc... after dinner we watched a bunch of pics on their WII that dad had put onto disc from slides of our some point we discussed about a job I'd applied for. My sister was mistaken that I'd applied at my former job at another district. My dad made a comment and I thought about it driving home and came up with this email that I sent just now before making this post:

hi mom and dad,

thanks again for dinner, and thanks dad for the slides.

Dad, please be careful saying things out loud like "he's blackballed at FORMERDISTRICT" that was discouraging in mixed company.

I'm not angry or anything just thought I'd mention it, you probably thought nothing of it but we should try to say only encouraging positive things in mixed company.

I realize it was family but still let's save those declarations for between you and me and mom. I am really sensitive when it comes to living up to my parents' expectations since I never fit the normal married with kids mold of what you probably wanted for all your kids.

Saying something like that makes me feel like you are critical of my choice to work in AFgnhanistn, and even though it's true I may never work in FORMERDISTRICT again I do not regret at all the experience teaching in Kaabbul. Yes I quit in the middle of the semester, yes it was a hardship on you all caring for my house, a burden for me yes I could have handled it differently. but I aim and hope to learn from my choices - mistakes, failures, lessons, gains, successes, and move forward and move on - :)

I love you both very much and was very happy to spend time with the family tonight.

the pictures were also a lot of fun to remember back upon.


ED: well maybe I shouldn't have said really sensitive, I want readers to know I live for myself and God, I'm not pining away trying to please my folks by everything I do in life. However, surely it's normal for how your parents thoughts, reactions, expectations.. to remain somewhat a force in life regardless of age... D

anyway, so I tried to keep it as brief as possible yet explain exactly how I felt without getting into it too much. hopefully this doesn't seem like a bunch of drama, I just wanted to be very direct in trying to communicate with good old dad. ha
the plans for the party tomorrow night are still on, I checked those who said they were attending and one guy is a very handsome guy I've stayed the night with before and know from here in OKC that I am looking forward to seeing. I think he had a bf last time I ran into him but still will be fun to just say HELLO. didn't shave today so I can be freshly shaved tomorrow night. hope all are having a great weekend, get that gift shopping done! :)

postman... she knows

where's my shirt...

jive to this while you're getting ready for the weekend...

or this..

first week of break a success! ha

been a busy week, Monday grading, Tuesday dentist and errands, rest of the week cleaning up the place, getting out CHristmas stuff, .. Wednesday night I went to documentary film at the art museum downtown, "Eames: The Architect and Painter." I was sort of really excited to see the crowd there, lots of guys younger and older than me, some sitting alone like me, others with girl dates/wives etc.. but there were a few I though, man he's hot, come sit next to me, let's talk about common interests like design and Eames.. ha actually the one I noticed most was this guy in front of me who seemed about my age and a bit receding hair on top and facial hair, dark eyebrows on a chiseled masculine featured face, strong shoulders, dressed in a sweater and slacks, not too dressy - not too casual. sitting alone. hmmm ha anyway, shucks I drove home thinking I need some nice calm quiet serious nerdish architect type guy to fall for. I picture myself with a masculine nice calm sort since I'm pretty energetic and conversational and all over the place with ideas in my mind. whew. oh, the film, you ask?.. It was pretty cool to see live interviews of people who knew and worked with the Eames, also a walk through of their house and office etc.. BUT as with most films the book is much better, if you're going to seriously appreciate the Eames, you must read Eames 101. It mentions ALL! ha, although I see now after the film it's kinder to Charles and Ray than the film which mentioned his philandering from Ray.
Yesterday, Thursday, I set up a few things out in the yard in the shape of trees, some upside down tomato cages that have a cone like effect, and some branches that I tied together in a bunch that also makes a sort of cone shape, wrapped lots of Christmas lights around all of them and plugged them up. looked great last night...I went over to my folks place yesterday afternoon before school to share a canister of cookies from Momofuku MILK bakery in Brooklyn that I brought back on the plane. chatted up mom and dad quite a bit. left to my last college class of the semester. I took over a class a few months ago for a professor that moved. She had scheduled the last essay due the last day of class. UGH.. .that means I got 14 essays to grade before Monday --- ahh nuts. If they'd turned them in at class, I could have read them through with out marking up too much and given the grade deserved, BUT her class turns them in online so I'll have to mark them and comment etc then send back the graded essay and post a grade...alas. actually it goes pretty quickly once I set into it. no worries.
Tonight I'm going work work work on cleaning up and grading papers. tonight I'm going to a new steakhouse restaurant downtown for dinner with a friend from Dallas who's in town. I know this guy from when my ex gf and I used to go to danceclubs here in OKC all the time. We both got to know C this small town super nice guy, we met him at a gay bar and thought we were really cool having a gay friend ha. anyway, now he's a doctor in Dallas and I couldn't be more proud of him. He and his bf are here for the weekend and he invited me out with a group of friends via facebook. Hope everyone is gearing up for the weekend, always super busy a week before Christmas. :)

Thursday, December 15, 2011

where's my camera...

anyone else notice how in pic 2 the sink spout is positioned just right that you have to see what it is at first glance... ha

ever felt this way....

who wants one...?

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

smooth operator...

I love jeffrey self

meloni's next special victims...

pretty cool news that former OZ star, Chris Meloni is going to be a vampire boss in the next season of True Blood. let the homoerotic hbo hotness continue...
I'd post a link but just google it...ha

nyc memories

rest of the nyc story

I've been crazy busy this week. I need to finish about my trip..
Saturday morning we got up, had an amazing breakfast at Burger Heaven, highly recomend this for a sit down diner type breakfast. we loved it and left Zaggy a nice tip. we made our way to a subway over to Central park. we got out at 86th and 8th and made our way into the park... walking toward the great lawn and MET and back in the direction of midtown. stopped off at a place near the Alice and wonderland statue for a knish (our mom is from long island and our uncle told us we had to try a knish while in NY) we shared a potato and spinach knish and it was rather perfect so warm on a cool morning. We spoke to a guy (actually my sisters spoke to EVERYONE.. ha) at the knish place who was walking a pug dog. He told us the dog was a star and to look for some new dog movie coming out produced by Madonna etc etc. something like that. ok :)
saw lots of street performers while walking back towards the corner of 8th and destination Hello Deli. my sister D and family is a big Letterman fan. she was THRILLED to see Rupert in there working away and took a picture with him and bought her husband a Hello Deli t shirt. Rupert, btw, is exactly the same and so kind to everyone coming in flashing pics. truly nice man. we went back by the hotel to drop off some shopping and then on a subway to Union Square... farmer's market and Christmas market shop shop.. I bought some homespun wool from some sheep herders, a few apples for snack, a lion beanie for J's kid, a canister of various cookies from MILK -a bakery in NYC that had a little booth. I'm taking the cookies to my mom and dad's tomorrow to share and eat with them. we went into whole foods for the bathroom and buy some things. btw there were people in Santa costumes all over Saturday. that made it really fun walking around. It was a Santa pub crawl/flash mob sort of thing. all day long over NYC groups of people in Santa or elf or other costumes. we took lots of pics. next stop 34th st. Daffy's first then MACY's! we shopped in Macy's briefly -- it was SO CROWDED ha Can you imagine coincidentally I ran into J, my former student who I visited at work the day before and stayed with last Oct? he was at the top of an escalator as we came up . He was with his gf and her folks so we all said hello and chatted then continued on. off to H&M, Uniqlo, Desigual. other places then up 5th back to 45th and our hotel. we rested up a bit and then got ready for dinner. to ARriba Arriba in Hell's Kitchen. my sisters loved it with the only caveat the loud music, but hey great atmosphere and great food. I got the same thing I did last time, the chicken mole. yum. walked back east over towards Rockefeller to see it at night.. the tree... etc. taking pictures..then walking back to our hotel.just before midnight I walked back to time Square to get a Swatch watch.(Our hotel was right down the street on 45th, it was the BEST location!) they had a buy one - get one half off on the watch I wanted, so I bought two so I'll have one as a gift for probably Austin bud. :)
SUnday, we got up and went back over to BIllabong on TImes Square to exchange a hoodie that my sister had fretted all night and morning about being the wrong size for her kid. They very nicely refunded even though it was a sale item so she was thrilled. we then walked east on 42nd over towards Bryant park and then Grand Central station . more pics there, my sisters loved seeing it and I took them under this walkway where you can talk into the opposite sides of the archways in the corner and here the person on the opposite side. They thought that was so cool. next stop Uniqlo on 5th ave and 53rd to shop for something that they had at the SOHO store but not the 34th store... we all made the last of our shopping purchases and lingered around Rockefeller plaza and below in the concourse a bit, then back to our hotel for final packing and out by 12:00 I had arranged a shuttle to pick us up at the hotel for $21 each that took us straight to Newark airport. all was fine the rest of the trip home. last big thrill was on our flight from Houston to OKC, we sat in front of native OKlahoman Bart Conner and Nadia Comaneci , and if you don't know who that is, they are gold medal Olympian gymnasts. My sister wanted to take a photo but I forbade her.. ahhh. sorry sis. Bart and his dad were very chatty and we made some small talk while waiting for the carryons my sisters had checked at the gate. a lady next to Conner asked if we knew who Kings of Leon was... turns out she was their step mom and substitute teachers at the same school district that my sister works in.
I'll try to get a few more pics up of our trip.

stuff girls say

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

strike a pose....

Tomorrow is the 100-year anniversary of Roald Amundsen's Norwegian South Pole expedition. A month later, Robert Falcon Scott, a Briton, would arrive with his weary team - admitting defeat. They would not return home.

tuesday dancer

Monday, December 12, 2011

nyc pics

the last pic is a marquee in times square at forever 21 where they do a crowd shot. I circled the three of us waving and me taking the photo etc..

end of class

well I was grading papers all day today and got them all done before class tonight. class went well and lots of students brought food. a few even brought home-cooked food, some enchiladas and tamales. YUM.. choco chip cookies chips etc.
SO that class is done. I just have to grade their final papers is all.
I've been invited to a dinner party this Friday with this guy who I've known since right after high school who is gay. He and his husband are coming up from Dallas for the weekend. He's a doctor now doing quite well and is the same good ole small town guy I met in OKC way back. great guy. not sure if I'm going yet since it's at a high priced downtown place and I just got back from NYC and need to watch my budget ha.
I'm already planning on going to a big party that a friend of mine invited me to, a lesbian I know from high school. I am looking forward to that, I wore a new shirt and pants to class tonight to see if I liked the outfit for the party...
NYC was tons of fun btw! Friday morning we were up and over to the TOday show in Rockefeller plaza. It was early and cold cold. As my sisters stood next to the rope barricade there, I went into Bouchon bakery to warm up and get a croissant. THey got on camera while I was in there and they came in to find me and were so THRILLED! ha.. they texted their kids, our mom, and other sister to watch for the show an hour later. I got my sister some coffee and also bought the most wonderful yummy tasty hazelnut macaron. yum! we walked towards 5th avenue and shopped first at American Doll store because my mom has many dolls that she dresses up and puts around the house ( she wasn't allowed dolls as a girl so now she plays with 'em, ha). I bought her 4 new Christmas outfits for a present I know she'll LOVE. My sister got a gift for her girl too etc.. next we went into Saks! My sisters loved that too. they couldnt' get over the high heel shoes for $565 and then my sis found one for $1400 marked down to $1000 something. ha we went in to find this stuffed animal in the window on the street. a Yeti, or abominable snow man, stuffed toy that we had to go see and find on the 9th floor. it was really really cute and was $69 which they were not paying for a stuffed toy. ha ha. but we talked about going back for that toy and book the rest of the weekend. it was really cute.
we made our way up to Hollister so they could meet my former student and friend who works there, next Uniqlo, next subway to SOHO. what fun we went to all sorts of place. btw I found the Papbubble store and got some really great mixed bags of candy. We made our way over to the New Museum of Contemporary ARt. really great booths on the way where I bought some ear rings for gifts and a t-shirt, both made by local artists. We all really enjoyed the museum, not too many exhibits but interesting and different enough. the tank exhibit, where you strip down and float, was close ( my sister has wanted to try it even though we all told her no and that she was crazy. ha) . but the slide was fun and the rest of it random. next lots more shopping around soho. eventually we made it back up to our hotel and got ready for the show Friday night over near 8th ave and 45th, How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying (HTSIB..). THAT was really awesome, we had seats 7 rows away, row K. a bit to the side but great great seats. We all loved both Larroquette and Radcliffe and really all the performers. the songs and all the dancing, the set and lighting, just great. we walked back to TIme square and shopped some more, I bought a great jacket I liked at Billabong and they got some hoodies for gifts. we had Cheesecake at ROxy's there on the square before heading back to the hotel for bed.
I'll get some pics up soon and post about Sat and Sun activities tomorrow. :)

chill Monday

fruit trees

Sunday, December 11, 2011

home sweet home

well dear readers. I'm home and survived the trip. my sisters absolutely had the time of their lives. they just loved everything and didn't want to come back today. ha
will update soon about what all we did, shopping haul, and the minor sports stars we saw on the way home. I checked in luggage on the way home and it made it. so I was thrilled bout that.
now to shower up and sleep in my own bed tonight, nothin' better! :)