Saturday, January 14, 2012


ya ever wonder why the hottest guys end up in the silliest movies?? first Freddie Prinze Jr. and now the ROCK!!!! I love the ROCK, yes I'll see this silly movie... :(

ruff ruff

not great, but...

jan weekend

only a few more left, what a great start to the new year. I've been going back to the gym after work this week and going through some of my former workouts just to get back into the habit. also wake up the muscles a bit without cramps and soreness. no reason to kill 'em. It sucks though working out with way less than you were at before. I guess I quit lifting heavily last spring break. I remember being up to 172 (I'm 6'1) and had some great back and shoulder and leg gains going, everything fitting great, I was up at the gym everyday, and I suppose at some point I just got bored of it all. boring just working out every day getting in shape and for what? ha actually another part of it was when my shoulder started messing up when I did pull ups. I started just doing cardio from then on. swimming in the morning during summer and lots of cardio etc..
now I'm down to 163 and probably have some weight on my gut in place of all the muscle weight before. btw keep in mind I have not a muscular build. I've been pretty skinny my whole life. I think I was 6'1 and 127 lbs graduating high school and in college it was all I could do to get to 140 lbs from working out. I remember each number passed, 150, and then 160, I remember thinking wow I'm over 160. just so you know that it's only from working out I could get into shape and gain weight. I have a pretty average body and try to attain a hopefully the athletic/swimmers build more than anything. Thing is for a TRUE athletic build you have to do athletic things, not just a gym body. you have to run, swim, train etc.. all that activity involved, get out and play basketball, really use the muscles not just doing reps with weights.
so that's what I always tell myself while I'm doing the reps at the gym, anyway. ha
I guess you could say I'm not going for huge size just staying in good shape.
ok enough about new year goals. oh one more thing, I like seeing other regulars at the gym that I used to see every day, I keep having the conversation with someone about "yeah I'm trying to get back to it regularly.." etc
I have a phone call interview today at 3pm for a teaching job overseas but I'm not even really considering it. I am following through for the practice of interviewing and to learn about the opportunity, but I've pretty much decided I dont' really want to move away for 2 years and leave my house and job here and everything. I am trying to search myself about why one side of me wants to move away, travel, experience new things, and the other side is completely happy working at my day job and the college class night job, love my house and life here etc....couldnt' be better. I think I feel disattached and restless at times being single and just watching years go by either way. whether I"m here or overseas. I was thinking that it's not really worth the hassle of dealing with my house if I went overseas again, and I don't want to sell my house either. ( I'm just thinking about all this by blogging, bare with me).
the main goal I had for this month was to get myself down to OU and apply for Grad School. If I'm ever to teach higher ed as a career I seriously need to consider getting a doctorate, so if I am staying in okc and living and working on and on I should be working towards that goal by returning to grad school.
we are out of school Monday for the holiday so a 4 day week next week. yee haw! hope everyone is ready for a great 3 day weekend.
I plan to get a hold of my Austin buddy this weekend and chit chat about his breakup and what's new. I plan to clean up my place and put all the Christmas stuff up in the attic and while I'm up there organize everything in its place. shop hydrangeas and japanese maples online and see if anything interests me on, work out of course, catch up on the stack of magazines near the mail drop, Outside, Traveler, Men's Journal, Smithsonian, New Yorker,... got a few to catch up on, probably bringing a few with me to have a pizza lunch today here in town. :)

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Wednesday, January 11, 2012


of course if I lived in London and biked to work a lot, it'd be perfect for me. :)

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

no pants

in case you missed no pants subway last weekend, here's a clip from boston, I actually know the guy at the first part debriefing on the train. He's from the same private Christian college I went to and everything! ha

this one's jsut for fun

Monday, January 09, 2012

what're you wrestling with?

Monday Monday

I was just driving home from the stock club meeting tonight and was thinking about some good words if I were ever to write a country song " Janurary moon, you're the brightest thing in my life tonight.." ha ha... I don't even know if that makes sense but I think it sounds like a good beginning to some sad song. another line I came up with is this " that couple in the rearview mirror makes me wish that you were nearer.." ha ha something like that anyway. whatever
jsut got back from a monthly stock club meeting, we didn't buy any stocks tonight instead, we're gonna wait and then buy with next months monthly dues added to tonights and then go from there. last month we bought 100 shares of First Trust COmpany stocks, and basically have been going for safe stocks that at least have some sort of dividend. BGG was recommended to consider for next month. or Canadian Oil Sands. anyway, I recently got a bill for paying back up escrow from my refinance last year, so I was asking about selling my recent stock purchase of SD or getting rid of my NCS stock from 2 years ago that hasn't changed much. We all agreed selling off the NCS stock that's just a dollar more than I bought it way back was the better one to sell to get my cash to pay that bill. Sandridge oil is bound to come up some more! :)
I did a lot of pricing of plane tickets today, trying to keep it around 800 or less for a roundtrip to anywhere overseas even though it's just a week, so I might consider going to London for a week in March and staying at the Dover Street Hostel which is cheap and clean and easy to get to around town. I like it anyway and have stayed there before etc...
thanks for the recent comments everyone. I think Shawn referred to another reader's comment about getting married etc, everyone has their own point of view. there are many gay blogs with pics out there, and hopefully readers figure out this is a closet gay blog, ( if you're reading, otherwise just scroll down and check out the pics, maybe the music? ). I wanted to sort of point out that the whole deal about closet guys sitting on the fence and coming out or not is sort of catch 22 when you discuss whether to just come out already or not. Most closet guys who are very aware of their sexual inclinations are perhaps not comfortable with how they will be seen or thought of if everyone knew them as a gay person.....on the other hand, out and proud gay guys might say that if all the gay men would come out and let the world know who they prefer sleeping with, then it would be more normal and acceptable etc... so it's a tough argument, not really what this blog is about. WHen blogging began, and when I began this blog a LOT of guys were connecting and sharing about this process of coming out. I found myself way different than most bloggers in that I didnt' really ever plan on coming out, just wanted to blog about how I was dealing with it and/or considering it. And one by one most of them wrote about coming out, and then most stopped blogging because they had nothing more to say, they were OUT! ha the best thing I've gotten from this blog is connecting with guys who are in a similar position, and I'm not one to say YES COME OUT NOW, OR NO NEVER COME OUT, or YOU ARE GAY, or YOU ARE NOT GAY. I will say as I am pretty sure I have before that sexuality is SO varied and of many colors and intensities and flavors and I don't think it has to be only 2 boxes for every guy to fit in. must everything so polarized, is that getting our nation anywhere? :)
ok well hoepfully that makes sense, guys good job commenting and getting discussion going. good Monday to all.

Sunday, January 08, 2012

burning man is a place

somebody i used to know

towell boy...

sunny SUnday

anonymous comment about not labeling myself, I couldn't figure out what it was in response to and was reading some recent posts, then realized, oh it's my description up in the right hand corner... okay. I think sexual orientation remains clear if you just check out the photos posted on the blog, I don't think I've tried to deny anything on this blog. I wrote that five years ago when I started the blog, and I still pretty much agree that it shouldn't remain a label whether someone's straight or gay. Knowing whether someone is straight or gay is definitely significant when looking for someone to date or sleep with, no doubt. Otherwise people are people and I think mostly live the same lives, and in kind deserve all the same rights obviously.
Good SUnday Everyone! I had a really nice weekend, came home from work Friday and got a lot done and relaxed and crashed early I think. Saturday I ran a lot of errands, home Depot for flashlights and air duct sealant foil tape, also shopped for bathtub faucets, I need to get a kit to replace mine, and I also checked out countertops options while I was at it, also Lowes for Milorganite and pine bark mulch... went to my sister's house for a birthday party the family was getting together for over there, and back home but first a stop to the local public library. I didn't bring home my work laptop this weekend with Word on it. A former student had asked me to proofread a letter he'd written for his application to Parsons school of Design in NYC, thus I stopped off at the library to download the file, proofread, change, comment, and send back. whew thank goodness I was able to do that within the 30m minute time limit. ha.. I actually enjoyed reading through the New York TImes paper while waiting for my turn. THere a little insert in the SUnday paper called New York TImes magazine that I'd forgotten how much I love reading it! downtown OKC used to have a little bookstore that sold all sorts of magazines, HUGE variety! and one of the things they'd sell was the New York TImes magazines from leftover NYtimes SUnday papers..for just 75 cents. I used to buy those constangly and read read read them. the store closed a few years back I think 2007 maybe? anyway, now I know I can stop over to the library to enjoy such. too bad there's not a way of subscribing to just the magazine part. I know I know it's online and all, but not the same I really like having it in my hands.
last night I went over to my bud S house and went out for dinner at a new locally owned places called Cafe 7. great place, we had stopped for some frozen yogurt on the way home and then sat around for a while flipping channels and catching up. He was telling me all about he and his bf's new year in dallas. I've been speaking more on the phone with my Austin buddy since his breakup. he called last night to talk about his new singleness and all and I told him at least he had a dog there to keep him company. ha hope all having a great weekend. I'm back to a full work week tomorrow and in my newcomer classes we have 3 less students who didn't return after the break, and we lose one more Tuesday. His dad moved to an apartment in another school district etc.. so my classes are down to 8 students now which means we'll be combining some classes. I applied for the facilitator job opening and not heard back yet, so I'm thinking of writing a cover letter to the director of bilingual education. although I already know the guy since he just got that job and was a facilitator last year . ha