Saturday, September 03, 2011

hey James

I usually just throw up some title to sum up the post in general... didn't mean it to sound like some awful generalization. All my students are from Mexico except one if from Honduras.
I'm in ARkansas and had an awesome time with my married buddy today, we took his 2 girls to a birthday party at the pool in town. swam around and took 'em down the slides. a 4 and 3 year old. my buddy and I in our swimsuits. ha. got a super tight short haircut from the barber in town, my barber from college only works tues and Wed now so I didn't get to see him. my buddy's not real happy in the marriage just now since the new baby boy keeps them awake all the time. so he's wishing he could come visit okc pretty badly. but I figure they'll adjust in time. I'm gonna be over at this place tomorrow doing a bit of landscaping with some plants I brought up from okc.
saw the ex gf tonight after dinner. her parents are in town visiting, we're all going to an Episcopalian church in the morning then her mom's cooking Indonesian food for lunch. shweet deal!
I got an email from my former roomate G in Afgishtna . He's still working for the same contractor and asked if I'd be interested in another job with them, and if not would I help recruit withing OKC for teachers. also there might be something interesting coming up to do in OKC. all very interesting.
happy Labor Day weekend everyone.

The Man-Moth

The Man-Moth

By Elizabeth Bishop 1911–1979 Elizabeth Bishop

Man-Moth: Newspaper misprint for “mammoth.”

Here, above,
cracks in the buildings are filled with battered moonlight.
The whole shadow of Man is only as big as his hat.
It lies at his feet like a circle for a doll to stand on,
and he makes an inverted pin, the point magnetized to the moon.
He does not see the moon; he observes only her vast properties,
feeling the queer light on his hands, neither warm nor cold,
of a temperature impossible to record in thermometers.

But when the Man-Moth
pays his rare, although occasional, visits to the surface,
the moon looks rather different to him. He emerges
from an opening under the edge of one of the sidewalks
and nervously begins to scale the faces of the buildings.
He thinks the moon is a small hole at the top of the sky,
proving the sky quite useless for protection.
He trembles, but must investigate as high as he can climb.

Up the fa├žades,
his shadow dragging like a photographer’s cloth behind him
he climbs fearfully, thinking that this time he will manage
to push his small head through that round clean opening
and be forced through, as from a tube, in black scrolls on the light.
(Man, standing below him, has no such illusions.)
But what the Man-Moth fears most he must do, although
he fails, of course, and falls back scared but quite unhurt.

Then he returns
to the pale subways of cement he calls his home. He flits,
he flutters, and cannot get aboard the silent trains
fast enough to suit him. The doors close swiftly.
The Man-Moth always seats himself facing the wrong way
and the train starts at once at its full, terrible speed,
without a shift in gears or a gradation of any sort.
He cannot tell the rate at which he travels backwards.

Each night he must
be carried through artificial tunnels and dream recurrent dreams.
Just as the ties recur beneath his train, these underlie
his rushing brain. He does not dare look out the window,
for the third rail, the unbroken draught of poison,
runs there beside him. He regards it as a disease
he has inherited the susceptibility to. He has to keep
his hands in his pockets, as others must wear mufflers.

If you catch him,
hold up a flashlight to his eye. It’s all dark pupil,
an entire night itself, whose haired horizon tightens
as he stares back, and closes up the eye. Then from the lids
one tear, his only possession, like the bee’s sting, slips.
Slyly he palms it, and if you’re not paying attention
he’ll swallow it. However, if you watch, he’ll hand it over,
cool as from underground springs and pure enough to drink.

Friday, September 02, 2011

speedo men on the beach weekend...


one of my Mexican students is pregnant

it's strange how dumb kids are and how easily and willingly they end up with one of 'em pregnant. I have these really fun well behaved students, sister and brother, who are living here in okc with their aunt, who already has 3 or 4 kids of her own to take care of...anyway, the dumb part, well they both really cute innocent type kids in their own way, the younger brother at 14 so typically 9th grade, and the sis at 17 just absolutely BEAUTFUL, her eyes, smile, just so much potential....well this morning she found out she was 2 months pregnant. GEE WHIZ!!! apparently a little romantic goodbye from her ex BF before leaving Mexico. The idea that these kids go at it so recklessly, I dunno, I mean you'd like to think gay guys wouldn't even consider sex unprotected but I've been in situations TONS of times (tons is for effect, what I really mean is many times) when a guy is ready to just go for it, protected sex or no. I'd like to think most guys are smart enough to consider the child support they'll be paying forever or the girl smart enough not to let that happen. but alas, this girl I just know will end up not even finishing high school, and she'll get more and more pregnant and have the kid before the school year's over, and yet I'll be throwing all the time and energy I can to teaching her English. I mean same as I do anyone in the class. It's difficult sometime to keep that optimistic outlook that you can teach them English, they can get a diploma, and then maybe, yes, maybe even college!!! or not.
another girl we had in the newcomer program lives with her older sister here in the states and the sister today was visiting for parent/teacher conferences this morning, saying it's all she can do to keep the girl in the house and not out getting pregnant. yup and this girl, also so pretty and she actually has a smart mind, yet she probably wants nothing more than to find a daddy. useless useless. she's been ditching classes so the school will put her on a contract so that if she keeps ditching they'll just say Goodbye. :)
The girl S who is in my class, 16 and with a 2 yo boy, came today with her mom, and 3 other younger brothers, the youngest which was only a few years older than his nephew. we spoke to her about supporting her and only wanting the best for her future by teaching her English, we had to make the point for her to pay attention and participate, and of course NO MORE CELL PHONE. ok one more.
this kid from Honduras came in with his dad, we mentioned how sometimes he seems moody at school, although other days a great student and super sharp (in more or less the same idea but we were speaking Spansh, ha) anyway the dad said he understood and that he left his son there at 1 yo, and now at 15 he was just getting to know him again.. yeah I guess so. also that his mother lived in spain, and that the GRandmother who raised the kid was like his mom and they were always atatched. blah blah, anyway, we said again we support and only want the best for the kids.
The dad mentioned how dangerous the gangs had become there. and indeed we've already been told by the kid that his uncle was mixed up with all the gangs there and a threat had been made on his extended family, which is why he had to come to the US in the first place ( he is the same student I mentioned was abandoned in the AZ desert by the traffikers. we have other students that are either here with their parents or some family member. the ones with 2 parents obviously we see the most support at home. home now and ready to get my weekend on! :)
EDIT: by dumb I mean careless obviously.... kids don't thnk, on the other hand I think it might reflect a sense of hopelessness of future or reason of life. the unstable moving around, living in a country illegally etc, too dangerous to live in your own country, living away from your parents, finding some sort of escape from it all with the dream of finding a man and child to give your life to perhaps. dunno... on the one hand you know I'm very supportive of tight borders and anti-illegal immigrant legislation completely, and yet on the other hand I know personal stories of trouble and fears and dangers of families living in Mexico who come here for a better/safer life. Why else would there still be so many Mexicans CONTINUING to come in illegally in a time of such jobless recession. They are working the jobs that even the unemployed are just too good enough for I suppose.....
ANONYMOUS: absolutely both countries share the blame, I agree one sells drugs, the other guns of course of course. America is happy to use the free trade agreement with Mexico although working rights and conditions there like all the countries we import from are absolutely awful. and I should also say about kids above, this applies to all American kids who can end up pregnant in highschool. I'm just mentioning the students I have in class and how much I hope I could inspire them to do/be more.

anyone getting to the LAKE this wknd?...




Thursday, September 01, 2011

good week and SEP is HERE!

have you ever come home from work and things seem unfamiliar 'cause you cleaned up the place and put everything away the night before. Man I tell ya what, I was walking around enjoying how clean the place was when I got home tonight. ha had another dinner date with my vet friend last night and she wanted to see the yard and my place so of course I had to clean up everything inside, this means take out all the trash, including all the empty cereal boxes seem to just add up sometimes. and put away ALL my clean clothes laying in baskets and on the couch and chairs and bed, and then put all the dirty clothes that sometimes end up in one pile into one basket out in the laundry room. etc.. OF course, what's funny, is she's a real no nonsense gal. She pretty much didn't notice too much inside other than what the closet size was in the guest room and then my kitchen wall. and she thought the plants were nice. like I said she's not much for words. ha. I'm ready to talk about stuff on the walls, paintings by friends, rugs from afganistan, ligth fixtures, ok ok, I'm not saying she has to say, wow great Frankoma tiki mug collection or anything, but still..... ha ha, I know I know I'm way too self absorbed, either that or I just need to get more visitors over here once in a while. School this week went really well and I said a sort of good bye to my students today. I'm losing 2/3rd of my second level kids. and I'll be seeing the newcomers twice a day now instead of once. and I tried to warm up a bit to the girl/mom who was having a tude problem. you can skip this part I'm going to rant about my school some.
We just finished our 5th week, progress reports, parent/teach conf today and tomorrow am. and there is a senior English teacher that's been out since school started, with different subs teaching her class. we are also short 3 math teachers with random subs and a math facilitator keeping them going. we also have various history classes being transfigured and combined here and there so that a teacher could take an extra hour of 12th grade history. anyway, all this in consistency and yet supposedly the school is doing a hundred different things to get that AYP scores up.. ugh. Have I mentioned the super overweight huge guy that teaches shop in my building? the one that drives a scooter thingamajig through the halls even though he has no handicap at all? well I'd complain but he's the union rep at the school so go figure. He owns a heat and air business and these 2 worker dudes that work for him are in and out of the school consantly and hanging out in his shop during the day, coming in and out of the school etc... I don't get it, so badly I wish I could write the principals and ask if they'd mind if I took up another business while I teach and have my workers come up and freely come in and out of the building around the other students/ what public school does that? anyway, blah blah blah.
ok well I'm ready for the WEEKEND. no kids tomorrow just clean up my classroom and move some things around... the begin the LONG WEEKEND. woot woot. :)

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

random thoughts

Mike I was really hoping you'd comment on the shoe post below.... come on, California BOY! :)

got the boat ready for big labor day wknd?


Tuesday, August 30, 2011

can your bf juggle?

the wrap


I ordered this magazine yesterday just for kicks.... it's a magazine with print on one side and the other side you can use as wrapping paper. Curious concept so I'm going to check it out. more info at The Wrap.

madcap monday..

whew yesterday was a whorlwind of events...was in the pool at 530 swimming laps, out and shaved and dressed by just after 6 am. breakfast etc and arriving at work 7:10, busy day teaching and keeping the kids in control etc teaching and then classic dan move, I left my COMP II class papers on the kitchen table.. ugh. so after school I drive back home to get the papaers, then back across town to the college. oh man, made some copies, got some activities planned for class. plus the calendar syllabus for my new class, went to class. taught right up to 8pm and came back home... had to unwind before going to bed so I was on the computie and blogging some up until 930pm then crash! my college class this year is full of talkative sharp people. going to be an interesting class I can already tell , and most seem pretty motivated which means they could be sticking it out to the end. that means lots of papers to grade, ha but surely not all 26 by the end of class. we shall see. no class next Monday thats for sure, so I will have a weekend getaway to ARkansas. I have a good mix of international kids in my class as well as younger and older guys and gals etc.. no complete hotties but lots of big tall guys in that class I'll tell ya what. mostly brainy type girls in there, one won't stop talking so I'll have to mediate a lot of class discussion to not let her overtake all the class discussions. ha also there is a very motivated Vietnamese high school guy in my class. he is really impressive and already joined into the class discussions. will be a good semester I'm thinking if I can just keep up with the book and sound like I know what I'm talking about. :)
I got my Austin City Limits tickets in the mail! so any readers in Austin going to be at ACL? I accidentally bought Fleet Fox tickets in Tulsa the same weekend, yikes, but a few friends already said they'd buy 'em off of me. thank goodness. I got to save all the cash I can now just for gas down to Austin and back. UGH all this dad gum heat. I did not get up early for gym today at all, HAD to sleep in after yesterday. home from work now and getting ready to head up to the gym. we are out of school Friday for parent conferences and progress reports. definitely feeling the 4 days work week , next week also, awesome.

Monday, August 29, 2011

no one here to help me clean up.....




is it something...

In the words of David Letterman, is it something? or nothing?

I've been eyeing these shoes pictured at the Oetzi3300 website.. ( I like the strap across the front, but I couldn't find pics with how it actually looks on the foot, some of the slip-ons look too round and cloggy in the toe...).... no I'm not buying any more shoes, I'm living on half months salary lately what with the planned trips coming. but a guy can still surf shoes on the internet, right? the last shoe is by Creative Recreation and if you know me by now at all, you know I have this thing about brown and grey, I was just thinking this morning about if I were to choose my favorite clothing color combinations, and why not, it would be tones of brown and grey, and second runner up tones of army green and anything. ha :P


my boys...

Sunday, August 28, 2011

what am i doing at this gay party

well I went a social function this weekend, imagine that. It was the birthday party for the friend of a friend here in OKC. I went ahead and went along and pretty much had a good time. Basically knew a few people there who I've seen around from when people used to go to gay bars here in OKC. We actually all talked about the Wreck Room and ANgles and CHekerz the best DJ ever etc etc. drag shows they used to have on Sunday nights and all that. I talked about how before 9/11 you'd see military types from Tinker Air FOrce base at the clubs all the time. this was when internet was still new and there was AOL men4men chat rooms but not yet the social networks out there now where you put up exactly what you want, maybe a face pic or x pic and play the stupid lonely game of hook-em-ups. well anyway,
It was fun talking to the guys there and my bud S and I talked to a few different people and caught up with a friend of his that just got back from P town last week for a big carnival parade weekend. He said it was crazy fun, and this was a month after he had ended a 12 year relationship with his bf. whoah. oh yeah, this being Oklahoma we all talked and complained about the weather, or course.
The guys house was pretty packed with people at one point, but no one really too interesting just a bunch of gay guys somewhere between below and above 30 and up. the one good thing about actually socializing at parties is you can talk to a guy and not jsut stand there like at a club and stare forever. ha We spoke to one guy who is an underwriter for mortgages and then actually there were 2 or 3 guys there who aren't currently employed which sucks, even Oklahoma isn't recession proof. I felt bad for talking about my NYC trip and the shows I plan to see. But gosh at some point you have to get the conversation going, I was trying to keep it going asking where guys were from, and then how this one guy hurt his leg. and next time I'll talk movies you've seen recently instead of broadway shows. ha
My dear friend S. is quite a trooper, he has a bf in AR and wasn't even looking at the party, although what am I gonna do for a source of who's who online at these parties if he's no longer online looking anymore?? ha ha
Did I mention going out on a pizza date with a girl from high school last week. it was jsut a friend thing. but heck we're both still single why not get out and see another friend. We're having dinner again this week and then she wants to come by and see my yard and the house etc... she's a veterinarian here in OKC and smart and cool and interesting.
well it's sure to be an interesting week. I'll be packing up and moving my classroom stuff into an office for the ESL dept. and we have no school on Friday for parent/teacher conferences. I worked at the water park this morning and only one more weekend to go. One of the girls at the water park was at the OU alumni basketball game this weekend in Norman and said Blake Griffin signed her Saxaphone. ha now that's pretty cool. anytime he's in OKC for anything that guy is all over every news channel. OK loves that guy, when he went to play for clippers , everyone was wearing LA clippers shirts suddenly everywhere in okc. what support!
hope all had a good weekend, could you send the rain and stuff WEST young man, GO WEST!

more kozyndan

kozyndan from mwkless on Vimeo.

get me out of these camo's....