light fun? gay culture confusion?

i was reading THIS POST ON GAY BANKER BLOG last weekend. It hits the nail on the head for me about the confusion of what I like with guys. I am pretty much the same style when it comes to looking for action with a guy, light fun, not completely into the whole sex thing. And I understand completely the whole thing about being overwhelmed/turned off/confused/disheartened by the whole -top/bottom exactly what i like and don't like in detail sexually- ads posted online....
Yeah.... i get it... for the quick fix of man on man physical action, it definitely helps to find what you're looking for. But on the other hand for guys wanting to touch another dude without going all the way, and then the whole question of what is gay, and does that mean jerking with dudes, sucking off with dudes, or going all the way and having full out sex, I guess it's all gay but then again what if its only physical and nothing you'd want to live with. In which case it comes down to the heart and not the dick. Just thoughts. but you can read the post yourself I thought it was interesting.

I check out craigslist ads now and then just for the pics, and in about every city you always see the same thing, a bunch of guys expressing it clearly they want a masculine not "gay-scene" dude, possibly a regular sort of thing. Does that mean that being gay is still seen as non-masculine? or is it the fear of closet guys that make them think gay is non-masculine? Obviously there are plenty of these guys around, they jsut have a hard time getting connected. Perhaps there are more guys these days coming out and just being the same any type of guy, but also gay. In comparison to the generalization of coming out, hitting the gay bars, surrounding yourself with only gay friends, etc etc. There must be a conflict with some guys who equate coming out as gay as taking on the entire stereotyped lifestyle. And these guys choose to stay in the closet, desperately seeking other "straight acting, discreet" dudes online, and perhaps those who actually connect emotionally and not just physically for hookups find the courage to come out a llittle. anyway, check out the blog, I enjoyed the post. keep up the good work, gay banker!