came home from work tonight to find a wedding invitation from the ex gf. i would say the one that got away... but I know everyone would say that never could have happened if I'm gay etc etc.
anyway, it's a pretty big deal, nothing major, just another point among the steps in life where you realize time is passing , people are living their lives with or without you, and time doesn't stop not for one confused minute.
I called her mom immediately to get a current phone number, last time we spoke in person was June 06.
I just got off the phone speaking to said ex gf for an hour, we spoke like it was yesterday, you know the kind of friend that is completely the same no matter how much time has passed. basically I wanted to know if this guy was going to take care of her and treat her right, priority number one, and I explained to her I think of her often although more like a big brother wanting to protect her from any guy who might hurt her,( since I wasn't going to be the guy.) etc etc and of course we still love each other very much, but not in love, more like we grew up together since first grade and have expereinced many life choices up and down, with and without the other. She really is the sweetest little thing, gorgeous body regardless of the scar down her back from when she got ran over by a truck jogging one morning (my last year in Honduras, I almost came home for but her mom assured me she was OK). anyway. blah......I made sure to ask how her grandma is doing since I haven't seen her in 3 or more years, and then told her of my new neice and nephews, and we spoke about our goals, me with my career, and her resigning and being a wife and volunteering etc... churches, parents, getting older....
so now I'm looking forward to the wedding to see all our old friends and her family. and right about now I'm considering whether I want to go to bed and pray for her, or just consider random guys and masturbate vigorously, or both.